No Corny Jokes

What’s the deal with the commercial with the couple sitting in a park and the guy gets offended when the girl offers him a popsicle that contains high fructose corn syrup? She reassures him by revealing that high fructose corn syrup is comparable to other sweeteners and is fine “in moderation.”  First of all, I didn’t know that high fructose corn syrup was a controversial sweetener.  (Compare this book title and cover design to this book title and cover design.  Has the state of artificial sweetener really gotten that much worse? Good grief.) Second, who is consuming high fructose corn syrup in dangerously large quantities? The Corn Refiners Association website, which pimps the use of high fructose corn syrup (in moderation, of course – everyone knows that!) notes in its chart comparing common sweeteners that sugar and honey may or even tend to come from foreign markets when the question of where it comes from is answered: “Domestic and imported sugar cane and sugar beets” is where sugar comes from, and honey comes from “Nectar from a variety of flowers and trees. Most honey is now imported from China.” These answers go out of their way to suggest the idea that these products are un-American, either by indirectly shipping jobs overseas or shunning the domestic economy.  Heck, I hear that terrorist training camps are now including beekeeping in the curriculum to keep steady the profitable flow of terrorist honey into the US.  High fructose corn syrup, however, is from “Yellow dent corn primarily growing in the United States.” Well thank goodness for that!

Mets @ Nats

Section 116, Row V, Seat 1

Things are ...

really bad in Pittsburgh:

"I'm probably not the guy to ask right now because I probably won't say ... it's just embarrassing. It really is. You've got three guys who run balls out right now. It's frustrating. Just frustrating. The whole thing is frustrating."

- The Guy with the Coolest Name in Professional Sports

really good in Los Angeles: 

(1) Ramirez recently joined Hank Sauer of the 1949 Chicago Cubs as the second player to hit at least 14 homers and drive in 40 runs in his first 40 games following a midseason trade and (2) with one more long ball, he will join Fred McGriff, Mark McGwire, David Justice and Carlos Beltran as the only players in history to hit 15 homers for each of two teams in the same season.

Morning Quiche

My blogging has declined so sharply recently perhaps because I have been insulating myself from the high tide of political media coverage that I normally subject myself to (“political media coverage” of course refers to this foolish presidential election, because God knows that nothing else in the world is happening, otherwise the press would be covering that too, right? Hello? Is this thing on?). However, I did a little reading this morning and have some links to share, as well as an abridged version of my impressions of Sarah Palin’s shaky performance last night in her interview with Charlie Gibson.

First, the links.

Howard Kurtz of the Washington Post wrote an article about why some members of the media are getting very frustrated with this election, then a blog wrote a response to Kurtz, which is mostly a continuation but there’s some criticism thrown in for good measure. Both good reads.

In this space I would normally link to Krauthammer but today he is disappointingly predictable and is barely worth reading. I do have a reason for mentioning an article barely worth reading, however, and that is that the article is symptomatic of the reason for my self-insulation: nothing much is going to happen between now and the debates. Yes, Palin had her interview last night, so today we get to dissect and analyze obsessively, just as we will whenever Joe Biden makes an innocent comment, probably a joke, about women that will get blown out of proportion by the Republicans and whenever Palin makes an innocent comment, probably just a motherly reaction, about her family that will be blown out of proportion by the Democrats. But nothing real will happen: no one is going to develop and propose any new policies or solutions (Congress most certainly isn’t, despite the fact that that’s their job, but that’s an entirely separate issue, I’m talking about the candidates here). The four are just going to pound, pound, pound the same old drivel into the people who have been paying attention all along and have heard it all before. Do they not realize that even speeches about change (I use the term loosely and only because they do) can become static, in both a metaphorical and a descriptive sense?

I read this morning that Palin was in her element when discussing with Charlie the topic of energy. That’s nice, because she absolutely bombed when he was asking her questions about foreign policy. She had apparently been hastily coached to answer with party rhetoric. She was horribly nervous. She reminded me of a kid who had been caught not having done all the homework from the night before but was trying to skate through a question by the teacher. She did a good job in avoiding questions but not in being slick about it. Charlie Gibson is no dummy. She apparently didn’t know what the Bush Doctrine is. I could imagine, when Charlie asked about it, her handlers in the green room smacking themselves in the forehead, saying “Expletive! We didn’t cover that!”

This is where I’m going to the trigger the abridgement of my opinion on this whole mess, and will hopefully get to the fuller version later.

One final link here. There have been many articles written about how the world outside of the US (such a thing is rumored to exist) will be disappointed if Obama loses. I understand the sentiment and it plays in a little into my own decision-making, but that’s another point that I’ll get into later. But I’m already sick of the articles, they’re all the same. This one is not the same. It’s from the London Times and actually explains to Europeans why Obama might not get elected, not just how crazy the Americans would be for not electing him.

Can't Resist...

wallowing in the a Phillie's fan self-pity:

As if ...

the Mets did have enough trouble.

They're getting sued and a hard throwing reliever is getting in trouble with the law.

But they are up a game and a half on the Filidelphia Fillies.  

As always Posnarkski is just so darn good when writing about baseball, especially his beloved Royals.

And this is just scary.  I mean seriously, if the Democrats can't win this election with this candidate and this opposition, then are they finished? And by finished, I mean, forever over.

From Shyster ...

Full text. Don't want to take the risk that someone won't click on the link:

"President Bush has hosted his final tee ball game on the South Lawn:
Today's tee-ball players, a special group of Little Leaguers, were children of active duty service personnel. The 26 5- to 8-year-olds had an opportunity to hit the ball, run all the bases, and play the field. Grammy award-winning country music artists Rascal Flatts performed "The Star-Spangled Banner" before the president told them, "Play ball" . . . The games were launched the first summer of the Bush administration in 2001 to encourage fitness among America's youth.

I think it's disgusting that children as young as five years-old are being subjected to history's greatest monster in such a transparent attempt to use the innocence of youth to make him look better. But before you jump on me for attacking the President, know that I am not referring to him:

Brian Kilmeade, co-host of "Fox & Friends" and Fox Sports broadcaster Tim McCarver called the game. They introduced each player and told of their favorite baseball player, favorite position or favorite snack.I have a child who is almost five, and I can assure you that I would die in a hail of gunfire before I'd allow McCarver close enough to her to ask her what her favorite snack was."

Clueless

This is the time of pro football fantasy drafts, pick'em challenges and all the rest.  Normally a football moron, it appears as if I've taken my ignorance to the next level.  I've been so preoccupied with the baseball season that I don't have the foggiest idea about anything non-Giant related.  (Packers in '08-09! So glad that Brett came back for one season .... !)

I need to admit it, I am not interested in neither the GOP convention now, nor was interested in the Democratic convention last week.  The spin coming for newspapers is enough to make me dizzy and the commentary on CNN, FoxNews, MSNBC or any place else makes me queasy.  I'd love to mute the volume, but then I couldn't hear the speeches.  Wait a second, maybe that's a good idea ... 

Morning links:

-- Tuck Sez makes a pretty good observation on Ozzie Guillen.

-- The Shyster goes after Rick Reilly and scores some direct hits.  This half of Middle Relief at least attempts the ruse of staying in the "middle."  However, a class action law suit on behalf of players who didn't take steroids or PEDs? Slow news week Rick?

-- Ladies and Gentlemen, this is science!

-- Night of the Living Fred at the GOP Convention! Hide the children!

A Really Good Question....

Do illegal immigrants have the right to unionize?

I don't know.  Of course, business says no, unions say yes.  

The answer is likely somewhere in between.

Morning Quiche

Things on my mind this forenoon:

Nationals on a 7 game win streak! The bad news for them is that I am going to tonight’s game, so they will almost surely lose. Sorry, fellas.

Bristol Palin’s pregnancy should not be a political issue, and I am pleased to see that it appears that no one (relevant) is going to make it one.

Hardly anyone knows anything substantial about Sarah Palin, so we all need to reserve our judgments for the moment. I have been very open about the fact that the main reasons I like her so far is that she is reported to eat mooseburgers.

I’m not sure for whom I am going to vote. Is Bloomberg sure he’s not running? There are still two months left, Mike!

I am very pleased with my first fantasy football draft. This only adds to my excitement about the NFL starting up this weekend.

I wonder how hard it would be to become the mayor of DC.

Arkansas Megan and I watched There Will Be Blood last night, and it made absolutely no sense and was entirely too long for a movie that makes absolutely no sense. Yet, Daniel Day-Lewis still managed to be very good.

I acquired a couple hundred Bob Dylan songs last night. I will find a way to listen to all of them.

I suppose one of these days I should actually send out the story of the baseball odyssey, especially since the summer has unofficially come to a quiet close with the passing of Labor Day.

This symbol is called an interrobang: ‽ It is used in the stead of the grammatically incorrect double question mark (“??”) or combination question mark and exclamation point (“?!”) to express disbelief or excitement through a question. It is an actual punctuation mark but is rarely used, although grammatically acceptable.

It’s September already‽