The Slow Burn...

Two news stories that are giving me heartburn ... both of which were from over the weekend, but I've only recently gotten reconnected to the Internet and calmed down enough to attempt to write rationally about them:

There is a promotion that will be taking place at the All-Star which might possibly mimic a historically fictional event in a stadium where the purported event did not take place.  Huh? Exactly.  There is some foolish contest during the All-Star Game Home Run Derby during which David Ortiz will attempt to hit a home run in the location to which some lucky fan points.  If Ortiz completes the "Ruthian" task, wonderful prizes belong to the fan (An SUV hybrid, oh hurrah!)  And well, Randy Levine as the designated foreign minister of Yankee Empire thinks that a Red Sock performing such a task would be, well, as inappropriate as the Yankees losing in Game 7 of a World Series.  

A few points: 1) Ruth never called his shot.  It's fiction.  It's great fiction, I know, but it just never happened.  2) The Home Run Derby is the biggest bastardization of baseball I know, and yet it's going to get more coverage because of this asinine exercise.  And 3) karma says that Ortiz must hit a sch-nide for tempting the baseball gods such as this.  To mimic a fictional event in which the greatest player in baseball history participated ... why do ye tempt the gods such?

Oh yeah, and one more point: Shouldn't the Yankees be more worried about, I don't know, getting beaten to a pulp by the Baltimore Orioles? Shouldn't MLB have contacted the Yankees beforehand and gotten an okay on this? I mean, the all-star game is taking place in the second holiest place in the major leagues right now! (Wrigley is one, Yankee Stadium 2, Fenway and Chavez Ravine are tied at three.) Shouldn't the Red Sox be concerned about karma biting them?

And ... did I forget to mention ... the called shot ... never happened?!  Which means the event/contest is just plain dumb.  'Nuf said.

And for the second story that is just beyond me.  Studies show that barbecuing may increase your risk of cancer.  Especially processed meats such as brats, dogs and other fine sausages.  Grilling meats to the point of charring also increases your risk.  The research says to grill vegetables instead of red meat.  Ignoring all those fine, safe chemicals that are used to get your zucchini to grow, of course.  I don't mean to make light of cancer research.  But, with a mother who is a survivor of cancer who falls into the large cohort who can say, "I got cancer for no reason," along with other survivors in my family, I truly take umbrage with statements made like these.  I don't know of many things that humans consume which don't carry some type of health risk.  Hell, I've had water from a Jersey Reservoir for most of my life - that can't be safe!  And to publish statements such as these only serves to scare people into making lifestyle changes that may not be in their best interest.  Cut out red meat, add vegetables, but not those vegetables, and only wash them in this way ... and on and on and on and on and on.  As my mother (the lover of grilled foods and cancer survivor) always says, "Moderation is the key."

What is the "Yankee Way"?

The Goose (Gossage) doesn't like Joba Chamberlin fist-pumping, shouting, greenie-popping antics. Oh, did I say greenie? I meant ... oh nevermind.

But anyway. The Goose brings up some valid points about the idea of being "old-school" and other such forms of baseball that the ESPN generation has rendered obselete. (And I weep about that fortnightly or everytime I watch Terry Francona yank Mike Timlin with two out and no one on base to bring in a Lopez to face a lefty - whichever comes first.)

But this entire notion of the "Yankee Way" confuses me a bit. What exactly is the Yankee Way? The stiff upper lip, the 23 World Championships, the House that Ruth Built? Does the Yankee Way include a drunk Mickey Mantle getting his knee run over be an equally inebriated Billy Martin? Does it include the Yankee Wife Swap? Is the Yankee Way the excuse for being the second to last team in the Major League's to integrate?

Listen, I'm a Yankee Hater, I will admit. But I absolutely acknowledge the preeminence of the Yankees in baseball, and all the kudos that go with it. I recognize that over the last 12 years they have had an extraordinary run of success. All that being said, I think that the "Yankee Way" is more responsible for the absolutely unrealistic expectations placed on the team every year and the near apoplectic reaction from fans and the owner(s) when the team loses more than two games in a row.

[correction: 26 world championships]